Squinting his eyes to better see in the light of a pale gibbous moon, he hurriedly takes out the short pencil hidden in his shirt pocket, and proceeds to write on the little scraps of paper he was able to salvage from the trash. Everything that he writes, and all of his thoughts and emotions, will be carefully placed inside a little time capsule.
Not more than a month since we started our relationship, my girlfriend asked me if I wanted to join her on their trip to South Korea, scheduled the following year. To those of you who know all too well how I’m not really a fan of overseas excursions, you can easily guess what my reply to her was.
At various points in my life, I have always found myself at a crossroad. That time when I stayed at the library to find out if I had a shot with this girl that I liked. Or that time when I thought of whether I should just go home, or whether I should run off to the airport to send off that girl I wanted to date. Or that time when I had to decide between staying at the office watching the final season premiere of Heroes, or mounting a rescue attempt of sorts to see this girl I really felt close to.
Stars. Tiny little dots that light up the night sky. Sometimes, you’ll see clouds. You know they’re clouds, because of the illumination brought by the light of the moon. Hah, the moon. I could just stare at it for hours, and I still wouldn’t be close enough to reaching it. It would be just like when I was a kid, wishing to see space using a high-power telescope. I’m still light-years away from realizing that dream.
Dreams. There was a time, long ago, when I gave importance to these… visions, born out of slumber. There was a book that I used to read as a kid, and it offered some answers as to what your dreams meant. I’ve always found it amusing, that for every possible object, there was a supposed meaning. You dreamt of cars? There’s an explanation for that. You dreamt you were flying? Read on to know what that means. When we moved to a different residence, the book seemed to have gotten lost. And, as I got older, I lost interest in trying to find explanations for the dreams that I had.
Still, there are times when I would wake up and find myself lost in a haze, wondering what it all means.
A friend of mine was having this dilemma of whether he should stay in his place of work, or move on to another career path. He had his share of reasons to stay and leave, with the leave option having the most shares. What was interesting, was the one reason that would make him stay: the girl that he’d like to see more of.
I just had a dream, and its impact was such that I had to write about it.
As I give it some more thought, now that I’m awake and aware of my surroundings, I realize more and more that the chances of that dream seeing the light of reality is almost near to null. I say almost near, because there will always be that minute longing inside me, secretly wishing for it to happen.
Improbable, because when someone you know puts up this much of an effort to distance themselves from you, you immediately catch on to the fallacy offered by the dream. You see the illusion, but find yourself pining for such an illusion.